Through a strange confluence of circumstances, involving a pastor that didn't arrive and illicit alcohol at a dry wedding, I am now an ordained minister.
According to the email I got after filling in the form, I can now perform Weddings, Christenings, Last Rites and Absolution of Sins.
I have also joined a list of illustrious people that includes all the members of the Beatles, Mel Blanc, Tony Danza, Richard Branson, Johnny Carson, Sammy Davis Jnr, Doris Day, Hugh Hefner, some members of The Village People, Alanis Morrisette, Conan O'Brien, Kevin Smith, Barbra Streisand, Hunter S. Thompson, Russel Brand, Sir Ian McKellen and Bryan Cranston.
The creed is also pretty easy, freedom of religion and 'Do only that which is right'. As a person lacking in any beliefs, that is something I can agree with.
Of course I did splurge on the Ordination Package and got myself a certificate and press pass as well as wallet credentials and parking permit, recently I also received a cap and lapel pin. All of which is only for show.
The day I received my certificate in the post I was at a party which moved to a club, I was also convinced by two pretty little things to dress up in full regalia before going there.
Considering that this was a goth/alternative club with people in leather and gas masks, I was still pretty surprised that some people noticed the collar and got upset.
The ones that actually spoke to me were cool with the idea of a Reverend without belief, that could absolve their sins by sprinkling whiskey. The other ones just glared at me and I could tell that they were not very keen on the desecration of cloth and symbolism.
All of which got me thinking about the relation some people have with the symbol vs the belief.
By definition, a symbol is only the thing that stands for something else, a type of shorthand for a greater and bigger concept that would be way too long to put on a bumper sticker.
A symbol is nothing in itself, it does not carry any weight or power, it only serves to indicate or show something else and can be used by anybody to indicate anything.
I had a very one sided conversation regarding the Pentagram, which has alternately been used by the early Christians, Sir Gawain of Arthurian fame, the Bahá'í, Wǔ Xíng Chinese Tradition, Latter Day Saints and Modern Wiccans.
It does not mean the same thing to all of them, and can be co-opted by any new belief and any meaning can be ascribed to it by anybody. To me it does not mean anything, yet the person I was talking to wanted to get into a discussion about whether it is good or bad if pointing up or down. All of which are artificial constructs.
Another good example is the Swastika, it was in use in India by the Indu Valley Civilisation way before the Nazi's were a thought, yet they co-opted it and ruined it for everyone. Even so, it is still being used in Asia, without the Nazi connotation.
That is the nature of symbols, they have no inherent meaning in themselves.
Me having the title Reverend and wearing a collar at a club, should not affect anyone's belief, nor should they be bothered by it. Yet in their minds the symbol and the thing it represents has become one and the same.
Sprinkling whiskey and repeating the 'this house is clean' line from Poltergeist to absolve sins may be pushing the envelope, but if I am mocking the idea of religion as opposed to your specific religion, should you not be able to have a conversation and reasoned debate about it?
I do realise that not all people are as enlightened and intelligent as others, but they can at least try to defend their viewpoint instead of dirty looks.
The next step is to be registered by the government so that I can also legally perform marriages, there seems to be a need for a non-denominational, non-religious service.
So do not be too surprised if an Irreverent Reverend arrives at your local pub, looking to get drunk, I am not too hypocritical about that either.
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