Hof toe, want die einde is naby

We will qoute this story verbatim, it is just too weird.

 

Hoofregter Mogoeng Mogoeng het gister ’n “uiters dringende aansoek” ontvang vir ’n bevel deur die konstitusionele hof om ’n “ondersoekende taakspan” aan te stel na die bewering dat die wêreld op 21 Desember gaan vergaan.

Daar is ook “’n dringende behoefte” dat ’n nuwe staatsdepartement gevestig word om voorbereidings vir volgende Vrydag te tref.

Dit kan die departement van die “paranormale en esoteriese wetenskappe” genoem word, voer Robert Sefatsa (38) van Soweto aan in sy stukke, wat by Mogoeng ingedien is.

Hy sê volgens die Maja-kalender val die oordeelsdag op 21 Desember en dit vereis dat Suid-Afrika en alle lande ter wêreld op ’n gereedheidsgrondslag geplaas word.

Hy meen ’n kommissie van ondersoek na die Maja-kalender moet uit onder andere geoloë, statistici, astronome, ekonome en buite-ruimtelike tegnoloë bestaan. Dit moet binne 120 uur aangestel word om die regering oor die Maja-kalender in te lig.

Voorts moet ’n taakspan in gereedheid gebring word om aspekte soos lug- en seelogistiek, ontruiming en hervestiging te kan koördineer as die wêreld inderdaad op 21 Desember vergaan. Sefatsa vra ook dat alle staats- en private instellings gedwing word om betyds “evaluasies” te doen in geval van “’n kosmiese oorgang”.

Mogoeng oorweeg die aansoek.

 

Not a scam or a joke..click the link.

Hof toe, want die einde is naby

Religion should be Pro-Abortion

Allow me to expand on this simple idea.

The religious right will hammer on about the sanctity of life, but one of the biggest arguments with regard to abortion is that it is a sin. I disagree, it is a blessing.

Consider the case of a hardened criminal who has not repented and finally dies violently, he will end up in hell, correct?

Now the innocent baby that has not committed any sin whatsoever goes to heaven, correct?

Based on those two assumptions I can make a case that aborting a fetus, zygote or collection of cells; is the best thing that you could do.

The big question is the existence of the soul, with religous beliefs this is a given as well. The next question then is whether the soul exists beforehand and enters the body at the moment of birth or during conception.

One can also argue that the soul gets created by the same god that would condemn the person to hell or allow to enter heaven. The general consensus from the religious standpoint is that the soul comes into existence at conception.

With those assumptions agreed upon, and without getting into arguments about when the soul gets created or becomes part of the body, what would happen to a soul-containing fetus that gets aborted? The body dies, but the soul lives forever and either enters heaven or spends eternity in hell.

A merciful god would not send this soul that has not committed any sin to hell for the sins of the parents, the other option is that the soul gets destroyed by the same god that created it.

This too does not seem feasible according to the scriptures.

The only option, logical conclusion or result - according to scripture - is that this poor innocent soul ends up in heaven.

Thus the only argument that can be used with regards to anti-abortion from a religious point is that the parents have commited a sin, the soul from the fetus being innocent and without blame, it basically gets a free pass.

Consider now that the parents or doctors were responsible for preventing another soul from committing any sin and ensuring that it ends up in heaven. Is that not the purpose of all priests and holy men? Is that not the purpose of religion itself?

The parents and doctors have actually  committed a 'perceived sin' which is no sin in fact.

They can be described as martyrs at worst, by doing something that society frowns upon, and leaving them open to condemnation, but the results of which is for the glory of their God.

By the abortion that they have been part of, they have ensured that another soul enters heaven.

Is this not the best thing that they can do?

Beer Time

It is well known that time can also be measured in increments of 'beers drunk' using a standard bottle size, but what of people that do not drink beer?

Notwithstanding that they are missing out on one of the greatest pleasures known to man (and real women), we have decided to release the following for general distribution in order to educate the common man.

The scientists at friendsofthekakiebos have taken time out of their busy days spent replicating their favourite movies in paper mache, in order to come up with a formula that can be used to calculate the Beer Time of other drinks using the below chart.

Simply multiply the Number of drinks with the Conversion factor and the Multiple Factor to discover how much time has passed.

N x C x M = BT

Where N is Number of drinks, C is the Conversion factor, M is the Multiple factor and BT is Beer Time.

A Draught beer converts to 1.47 standard beer bottles, for those who were wondering.

The conversion chart can also be downloaded here.

Calvinistic Tribalism

The Marikana tragedy and the ongoing strikes in the mining industry has highlighted a recurring issue in South Africa.

If you read the history of Southern Africa, there has always been wars and arguments over land and resources, the Mfecane lasted 25 years and resulted in an almost complete depopulation of large areas of land.

Then the missionaries came and further fomented and ingrained the tribal identity/hate in the region to the point that we now have smaller tribes of a much bigger variety.

Whether along the traditional ethnic, linguistic, racial or the newer political or trade union lines; we still have the same tribal mentality which was fucked up beyond repair by the silver-tongued missionaries.

I blame them for their misguided attempts at stamping out the traditional beliefs and the results that we are still experiencing.

I cannot be bothered to look up the verse, but you know the one: 'If you are not with us, you are against us.'

This ridiculous black and white mentality has been taught so that it is no longer a sin to take up arms and kill those that oppose you in any way. That is why we have fights and arguments, violent strikes and killings.

Coupled with the traditional tribal beliefs, is it any wonder that people get murdered?

In Marikana the police were opposed to the strikers, they instantly became enemies due to this stupid and idiotic 'us versus them' mentality. The strikes that turn violent do so for exactly this same reason. Once opposed, even if you are in the wrong, you have to retaliate.

Without a huge, concerted effort to recognise and accept differences, I doubt that we will make any headway and the killings will continue.
 

The God of It

In a perfect world we would not need to have this debate at all, but seeing that the US Presidential Election are coming round and half the people voting do so based on their religious beliefs, allow me to piss them off.

When faced with the two most incompatible super powers of their god, I ask myself whether the omnipotence can override the omniscience?

If he knows already what he will do (omniscience), did he choose to do it (omnipotence), or did he know that he was going to make the choice? If he knew that he was going to make the choice, did he make it at all? If not, then he did not have the free will and is not omnipotent anymore. If he didn't know that he was going to make the choice, then he is not omniscient either. This can go in circles all day long, and the question I want answered: Can he change his mind?

If you are a Watchmen fan you will know about the difficulty Doctor Manhattan has in relating to human beings as he can see the past, present and future all at the same time. (Just like Death in the Terry Pratchett novels.)

Towards the end of the movie he decides to leave humanity behind and spend a bit of time alone on Mars. This illustrates the foreign and strange personality and intelligence of a god quite clearly. He has no way to relate to humans as he can see their fleeting and insignificant lives against the backdrop of a whole universe that is there to explore and control.

With the power to accomplish anything, would you still even try?

I remember an argument with my sister a good couple of years back regarding the sex of god, she insisted he was a man because the mysoginistic bible writers said so. End of case. It was bad enough looking at a blue glowing penis for 3 hours, would you want to do that for the next few millenia in heaven?

We tend to anthropomorphize god and ascribe feelings and viewpoints to him based on our own belief systems and mores/values, which are pretty flexible and change over time. If you really believe in the existence of a god with the powers that you want him to have, you would have to admit that he is beyond comprehension and take the agnostic viewpoint.

That being said, it makes whatever he/she/it may be much closer to a complete and utter alien lifeform that we will never be able to understand and turns god into a a Lovecraftian intelligence that will devour us just as easily as save us. It would only use us for its own pleasure and amusement.

This god would be beyond any comprehension as it is literally able to move through time. It would be the most strangest and weirdest thing that we have ever encountered.

The religious can counter that their god is personal and cares and looks after them every day, but lacking any proof to the contrary, I can only think that this makes him the ultimate voyeur in charge of his own Truman Show.

This strange and incomprehensible being/intelligence will have no human morals or values as we understand them. And we still haven't answered the conundrum I posited earlier.

With no human morals or limits, would you really want to depend for your future on such a being? Would you really want this kind of stange alien life to have control over you?

We may just as well start praying to Cthulhu.
 

Got your ticket to Vegas ready?

We cannot say anything other than just think how cool this will be?

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No Pay, No Porn

'An ANTI-porn activist has expressed dismay that a 24-hour satellite sex channel is planned for SA early next year.

The channel will be titled PSat. The P is for porn.

Errol Naidoo, a long-time opponent of porn and the director of the Family Policy Institute (FPI) in Cape Town, said yesterday: “We will vehemently oppose this.” '

And the article from iol.co.za goes on, explaining the detail.

Go to google and enter 'Porn Subscription', it returns over 8 million results.

This fucknut is worried about one channel that you have to pay for to get? That you cannot access on your phone or tablet where ever you are? That you actually have to go home to watch?

A Channel that will be pretty mainstream and not as extreme as the stuff you can find on google.

Really! Can you be more ridiculous?

There is a thing called freedom of choice, which if you choose to exercise it and go through the effort of setting up a debit order and paying money every month, should not be an issue for anyone else but you.

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